Sometimes river time, the way we love it, is not what others are looking for. There are some folks who are not interested in a peaceful and soulful experience. No, for some, it is excitement and adventure that they crave. For that, the Chain of Rocks is where we go. It is just the place to amp up the adrenaline flow and put our skills to the highest test. It is probably the most troublesome, dangerous place on the Mississippi River for paddlers, especially at a low water stage.
Planet X dudes and Big Muddy Mike in the Chain of Rocks cauldron. Photo by John Torigan
Yesterday, we had the opportunity to provide the daring and exciting version of river time for a group of elite, world record holding Planet X athletes. Dave, Dan Mahoney, Ryan and their Planet X film crew, led by Brian Simpson, are pogo stick crazy. Dan jumps a world record nine feet in the air over things on his air compression pogo stick. Dave can flip his around mid-air, much like a skateboard dude or a bmx dude, and bounce or jump or stick again and again without a drop or tumble. His amazing acrobatic moves are cool. No, these are not athletes you would see on ESPN Sportscenter, but they are great athletes nonetheless. And their courage and daring are off the charts. They called Monday night, requested for a Tuesday trip, and we went for it.
At twenty four feet long, the Clipper was our choice of canoe to take the whole crew over the Chain of Rocks, filming in HD all the while. I explained how difficult our attempt would be. It excited them even more. I explained how we needed to provide for our safety in very meticulous and pro-active ways. They understood that well and helped set up a second canoe on the sandbar below the Chain as a safety boat.
At seven feet gauge height in St. Louis, the Chain of Rocks is a thundering obstacle course created by the mass of Mississippi River water (200,000 cfs, yesterday) flowing to a precipitous point, a ledge stretching the entire width of the river with massive boulders, rocks and assorted river detritus (refrigerators, car parts, anything that has come from flooded zones far away) layered through the entire river channel. The entire river is rushing, falling and tumbling in a labyrinth of boiling, churning and standing waves, with a washer machine hydraulic effect mashing and mixing the water. There have been deaths here.
From upstream at water level, you can’t see any of the possible lines of water to run. There are only a couple. River right is our preference for a more simple and less tumultuous run over the Chain. River left is for pro’s only. We scouted and filmed the Chain from a few vantage points, trying to decide where to paddle. Of course, the Planet X choice was the “rad” one, river left, in the “big water”, where the danger is highest, where I would not go unless I was completely confident that everyone could handle it.
We carried the Clipper from the parking lot on Choteau Island to a sand and mud bank just above the Chain falls. Everyone tightened their vests, checked their cameras and settled into the six seat positions on the Clipper. We paddled upstream along the bank, then did a big circle between the old Route 66, “Chain”, Bridge and the I-270 bridge, practicing our paddle strokes. Finally, we pointed it downstream, searching for the exact line we had decided on. We approached rather slowly, and got right to the edge where the water falls away, where the river simply grabs you, pulls you over the falls and hurtles you through the cauldron. I yelled, “Back Paddle! Hard!”, and continued yelling at the crew who quite impressively provided the power to abort the run.
When we got to the edge, I realized that I was not quite centered with the line of water I wanted. We would have dropped right on top of the big boulder marking the left side of the line. We circled around again, and I asked, “Should we really do this?” I got looks of amazement, as if, “what are you thinking? Of course, we should do this. C’mon, dude!”
We circled again and pointed the Clipper back to the Chain. I encouraged everyone to paddle hard, with no intention of aborting and only a slight chance to alter course. Over the edge we went, the high prow on the Clipper successfully shedding a good portion of the water that would have come in as it hit the bottom of the falls. The canoe bounced up into the huge standing waves, wiggled and rolled a bit, then followed the rush of water downstream. Whew! Twenty seconds of total rush and right side up at the end. I was “stoked” and relieved.
“Aw, man! that’s it?”, one of the Xtreme dudes cried.
“Yeah, that’s it.”
A moment of silence ensued as we turned into the eddy below the falls. Then, I heard one of the guys exclaim, “We should do it again, only this time, let’s go over backwards!”
Now I was the one with the… “Are you goofy?” look on my face. “No that’s quite enough. We don’t tempt the river gods too much around here.”
